My brain says no but my pants say off.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
