I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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