I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
