im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
