Non-Jews are for practice
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
His nipple licking is glorious
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