So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
