I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
