i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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