Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You're so nebulous sometimes
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Randomize
