just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
