you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
