just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
