I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
