come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
either way he was missing a nipple.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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