You're completely useless in the revolution.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
