At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Is it because I queefed?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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