I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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