We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Randomize
