no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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