He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
