Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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