i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
