so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
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