i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She even gives head with a lisp.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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