she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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