i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
this will be a night to untag.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
my liver is dry heaving
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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