he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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