You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
