i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize