I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
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