the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
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