I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
