reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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