I just found puke in my bra..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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