so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize