Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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