Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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