honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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