I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
is it fun? or sober?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
