Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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