I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Randomize
