im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
