yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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