yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
