Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize