We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
