You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
