i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Are we still banned from the library?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize