What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
