He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i dont even know how to be here
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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