I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize